I just learned today that Bigfoot had rejected my application for a position as Copywriter. So far, only two of the companies that I applied in have rejected my applications—Bigfoot and Convergys. I was truly interested in the Convergys post—they were looking for a Communications and Culture Trainer. As for Bigfoot, I was already starting to imagine what it would be like to work as Copywriter there. They have the reputation of having a loose policy on office wear. I’ve seen their employees go to work wearing shorts and slippers. I have learned to love the idea of working in such a non-restrictive environment.
Perhaps my desperation over having a stable job has heightened the disappointment that I felt in these recent rejections. I may have been too seriously engrossed in looking for a job that I forgot what it was like to enjoy the hunt. I remember the lesson I learned from my past achievements. That lesson was to never care about the outcome of the search—just to enjoy the search.
When I graduated with honors in high school, it was not such a big deal—I would not have felt less happier if I didn’t get the gold medal. When I won as National Champion in the Copywriting and Headline Writing Contest of the National Schools Press Conference in Malolos, Bulacan in 1995, it was not such a big deal—I would not have felt any less victorious if I received no award. When I sat down inside the contest room with the other student contestants, I did not feel very scared or nervous; I was calm and was just trying to do my best and enjoy whatever it is I was doing—and leave the rest to the judges. When I applied for the Ten Most Outstanding High School Students of Cebu award in 1996, I didn’t really look forward to being granted the award. I got awarded anyway. Though, I wouldn’t have felt bad if I didn’t make it. After all, my goal was not the award, but the enjoyment of having participated.
That’s why I’m rather surprised at my disappointed feelings. I wasn’t like this before. And, now I know why I feel this way. I better reflect on what’s happening before I take the qualifying exam tomorrow for Phil-Am Outsourcing Solutions, Inc. I’ve sent them my application for Copywriter, and they’ve asked me to take the qualifying exam tomorrow.
Tomorrow, as I sit down for the exam, with my pencil in my hand, I will keep reminding myself, “Em, enjoy this. Don’t think you will get something out of this. Just enjoy doing this.” Who knows? That just might do the trick. So, Em, do not care if you lose. You may win a game, but if you did not enjoy it, you are no better than the one who lost yet enjoyed it.
(First published on my private blog in mid-2004. I was on the prowl for a job at that time.)